The last couple of months have been so full of fun, friendship, and lots of activity.
The last couple of months have also been full of much thought about priorities and what is most important in this life.
They last couple of months have been full of reflection on where we have been, where we are currently and where we are going.
The last couple of months have been amazing!
I have had some feelings and emotions running around in my head that I just couldn't put my finger on. I felt like the gerbils were running all different directions in my head.
Last Sunday I went to church for the first time in who knows how long and the message was on contentment. The pastor asked us to think of something... anything ..... that we coveted. Not just something we wanted but something we felt we could not be happy without.
I couldn't come up with anything. I want lots of stuff. I want new clothes, a modified bathroom and van. I would love to remodel my kitchen and a ramp to my front door would be great. However, there was nothing I could come up with which I had to have in order to be truly happy.
It was then that the gerbils in my brain all stopped and began running in the same direction. I figured it out. I am happy. More then happy.... I am content.
I have a great support system. I have so many friends and family who do their best to understand my life and I have met so many wonderful people in the last four years who actually do understand my life. Each and every one of these people love me for exactly who I am.... nothing more, nothing less.
One of these people, my friend Michelle, came to visit the beginning of July . My friend who I met only a few short days after Makenzie was discharged from the hospital at the Ronald MacDonald Resort and Spa in Arizona. Two women who were not looking for a friend but looking for healing where brought together. Healing we found in the miracle of friendship!
We spent 10 days together. We watched fireworks, we lit fireworks, we went to target and Whole Paycheck. We went to see Cars 2. We visited two different malls, the Museum of Nature and Science, and the train museum. There was a birthday party at the bowling alley for Makenzie and DJ and we even took a ride down to Union Station on the light rail grabbing a bite to eat at the Hard Rock Cafe before heading home. Then of course there were the VERY late nights spent talking, laughing, and shedding a few tears together.
I realized something while Michelle was here in the midst of everything we were able to do. I realized that the life I thought was forever lost was starting to be found again. I realized that I had my feet planted on both sides of the proverbial fence. My life will always be sprinkled with wheelchairs and talkers. There will always be IEP's and medical equipment. I will always be proud to be a member of the special mommy club however, there is more and more pre accident life shining through every day!
Staycation 2011 from makenziesmiracle on Vimeo.
After Michelle left, Makenzie's Granny and Paw Paw came to visit.
We visited a ton, went to the mall, the American Girl Store, the boys did some fishing, shooting, and swimming. We BBQ'd twice and played a few games of pool. We had a GREAT time!!!
Makenzie's new American Girl!
Makenzie's Granny and Paw Paw have loved her very intensely from far away for four years. The last time they saw Makenzie in person was when she was still in the hospital. Watching them with her made my heart melt. They love her so very much.
Goodbyes are so dang hard!
I want Makenzie to continue to heal..... that will never change....... but I do not need her to be any different then she is today for me to be happy. I trust in God's plan and know that He continues to place His almighty healing hand on my little girl! That is enough!
I am content.
Believe.... Prayer Works!