Sunday, January 2, 2011

Reflection

I guess this time of the year is a time for reflection. 365 days have gone by and so much has happened. 2010 was good good year. It was a busy year  for the most part but at the same time it was the same thing, different day, for the last 365 days.

 In 2010 my oldest turned into a teenager and let me tell you, that has been an adventure. My middle son started middle school and being that he is a bit more social then his brother has experienced more worldly inappropriateness then I care to even think about! This behaviour coming from 11 and 12 year olds!

I have considered homeschooling ALL of my kids at some point in 2010 but I think someone would end up having to put me in the funny farm after about a week.  So, I am trying very hard to be present for my boys and help them to learn the right way to live from other children's bad choices.

In 2010 Makenzie was pulled out of 2 different schools for more or less the same reasons. I am not sure how many IEP meetings I have been to nor how many tears I have shed over the same issues but at the end of the day I fought the good fight but Makenzie is the one who lost.

We have continued therapy in both traditional and non traditional forms for Makenzie. We traveled a ton both in country and out in search of "the" therapy that may help. There are three that I feel did make a difference so in 2010 we focused on Stem Cell therapy, ABM, and IMOT.

Along with the therapy travel comes the expense and stress of what is working and where to spend a limited amount of funds. In 2010 after 3 years of no stop travel I began to feel the leading to slow down and just let God work in Makenzie. So July was our last trip for the year and Makenzie seems to be doing well despite our therapy break!

My boy's father lost his job 2 years ago and his unemployment ran out. He moved to a little mountain town over 4 hours away were there is no employment opportunities, with his wife, step daughter, and fourth biological child.Needless to say I have not received a dime of Child Support in over 5 months nor did he bother to make any type of contact with his children over Christmas. 

I changed the way I fed Makenzie and many disagreed with my decision. Doctors would not call me back and some ignorant soul thought that they knew better  then me and called Child Services. I am sure much to that ignorant souls dismay, it was found by all that Makenzie was being very well cared for and thriving! Imagine that!

But.......
  
"You never know how strong you are, until being strong is the only choice you have."

There are so many things that went right in 2010. There were so many moments of joy and healing! 


As I reflected on 2010 inevitably some of the not so wonderful moments came to mind but in those things much was and continues to be learned! Not every time in our lives can be a good one. There are times that really stink. Times that bring us to our knees with tears running down our cheeks. Times that make us wonder how we can go on but....... we do..... because it is the only choice we have!




For 2011 we have much to do. As I wrote about here, this year for me will be about learning how to embrace surrender. I am not entirely sure what that means in all the different areas of my life but I intend to find out! 


2011 is also going to be a year of planning and change. 


There are a couple of big things on the agenda.


1- Will it be possible to modify the home we currently live in to suit Makenzie's growing body and my physical ability to lift her or do we need to begin to consider a move in our future and if so, when and where?


2- The purchase of a modified van. These are not cheap. Makenzie is growing and so is her equipment. I love her new chair but getting it in the car is going to ruin my body. On top of that it is a bit time consuming to get her into the chair.  When it is cold... like it is now.... or raining or super hot, I have to push the chair into the store while holding her, waiting until we get into the store to put her in it so she is not exposed to the elements. I am not sure how much longer I will be able to physically do this.  


3.- ABM, Stem Cell Therapy, and IMOT. Are we going to do any of these therapies this year? Each requires different amounts of travel and funding. At this point I am waiting on God to open doors. No big solidified plans.


last but not least....


4. Deciding whether or not Makenzie will continue to be home schooled. Makenzie loves her friends and loves to learn. I can do the learning part but the friends part is a bit more difficult. I an going to wait until at least the end of the cold and flu season to re address this issue.


"No one can go back and make a brand new start, however anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending"
 
2011 is a new year! 

And it is going to be a GREAT one!!!!


Believe... Prayer Works!

 

1 comments:

Angela said...

Praying for the decisions you have to make that God will open doors to guide you. And that He will put the funds in your lap for a new van.

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