Friday, October 1, 2010

Done... Part II

"I am only one, but I am one. I cannot do everything, but I can do something. And I will not let what I cannot do interfere with what I can do. ~Edward Everett Hale

I had this whole long rant typed up. I was almost finished when the boys got home so I had to abandon the rant to go and tend to mommy duty.

In the midst of my frustration Makenzie had a very rough patch this afternoon which always sends me into a tail spin. When she is not feeling like herself it is debilitating for me. I sit and watch her, formulating a plan. I listen to her,and can feel all of the emotional and physical life drain out of me.

Tonight when Makenzie finally seemed to be feeling better I could breath but the exhaustion lingers on. The think is Makenzie is so smart. I believe that my stress is rough on her. Wait.... I know it is. She can tell and she reacts.

While I sat on the couch cuddled up with my princess I started to think about my rant. About why I was so stressed. The conclusion I came to.... school is not worth ANY of this.

So with that said... Makenzie is done going to school.

I could give you all the gory details.... all of which were in my rant....... but the bottom line is I do not feel good about sending her there..... So I won't! It is plain and simple. No stress required.

I do not feel welcome. I feel as though every time I suggest something I am less welcome then before. I do not feel heard. I feel like they are more focused on reason and policy's then on what Makenzie needs.

I can not make them welcome me. I can not make them integrate my suggestions. I can not make them hear me. If they can not or will not do the above then they will never know Makenzie's needs. I am fighting a loosing battle. I have been for 2 years and 8 weeks. I am tired. I will not do this for another 7 years. So I am DONE!

I have a call into the principal as he was out of the building today. I am sure he will call me on Monday wondering what the heck is going on. I will tell him my bottom line. I will ask for a meeting and we will discuss one last time my concerns and what it will take to meet Makenzie's needs. They will figure out a plan, they will implement it. They will have all of the adaptive equipment Makenzie needs and they will welcome me back into Makenzie's education. When ALL of that happens Makenzie will return to school.... not ONE SECOND sooner.

For now I am working on enrolling Makenzie into a homeschooling program. I am waiting for a copy of her current IEP and intake evaluation. After I fax the paperwork,  the special education teacher with the homeschool program will give me a call to discuss how best to modify the curriculum to suit Makenzie's needs.

So there is a back up plan. I hope Makenzie will be able to go back to school. She loves her friends and teacher.... by the way... regardless of all of this ..... her teacher is still awesome. I want Makenzie to go to school and learn just like every other child but other children learn at home too. So I guess if that is what ends up happening that will be ok too.

So not only am I done fighting with the school but I am done being stressed about it. What happens will happen. Either way it will be "the right decision". 

Believe... Prayer works

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