Tuesday, June 29, 2010

How Do You Do It

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I Have had many people ask me over the last few years how I do it. I tend to look at them funny and ask... do what?

They will then proceed to tell me something along the lines of how hard certain things are in their life. However, they just can't imagine how much harder it would be to  raise a special needs child and 3 other children, let alone as a single mother.

I usually just grin and shrug my shoulders.

See there really isn't a great answer to that question. There are many contributing factors like support from family and friends.

Really the true answer lies in the fact that God blessed me with 4 beautiful children. I do what any mother would do with that gift.

There are times when I feel I am failing horribly. Times when everything that needs to be done feelis lke it is too much to bear. Times when I just want to scream. Times when I wake up feeling overwhelmed with life and turn on the radio and hear a song like this....

and some how it feels all better. Why?......

For the simple fact that no matter how bad I think I am messing things up, my God is not disappointed with me. His grace is sufficient for me. I can come as I am.

Three years ago after Makenzie's accident I felt like I was living in a constant  nightmare. I just wanted to wake up. I wanted my life to be surrounded by a white picket fence. I wanted to take it all back. I wanted to live in a bubble and know that I was safe.

The grieving stage after the nightmare was the thought Makenzie was going to get up one morning and be fine. Full healing was just going to take a little more time and prayer simply because my daughter was special and there was no way she could be disabled... not my kid... that wasn't possible. God would never have that in His plan for her life..... Right?

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As time went by and I began to meet other people who had children with disabilities for all different reasons I began to think differently. Not ONE single person that I have EVER met asked for special needs. Not one of them wanted their child to stoke at birth, have a rare disease, autism choke, or nearly drown. Not one of them jumped for joy when their child received a diagnosis. There are MANY people in this world that live with a disability or someone who has a disability and not one of these people are any different then me.

I choose to move on with a smile on my face. I choose to look at the good things in life. I choose to see what my kids can do.... not what they can't. I choose not to be angry. I choose to continue to fight for everything I hold dear.

I choose not to sweat the small stuff. I choose to embrace what I have learned in the last 3 years. I choose to realize that I can not do it all and am never going to do it perfectly. I choose to love all of the amazing people I have met who didn't ask for special needs and those who continue to pray, support, and believe in God's healing.

So......How do I do it?...... Really I have no dang clue!..... I do it through God's Grace.... and that is my final answer!

How do you do it?

Believe... Prayer Works

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Tomas said...

Thank you for the wonderful post - for your unforgettable final answer. While reading "how do you do it", I too was enabled to experience God's Grace. Your wise words and the shining photos inspired me greatly- helped me to shift from temporal to everlasting - from sorrow for my limitations to the gratitude for all I am blessed to see. So to speak, you helped my Butterfly in the Plaster to ride the sunbeam again. Thank you.

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